December 17, 2009

A new box

So I'm in the middle of my lunch yesterday, and I get a call from my mother.  The conversation lasted all of about ten seconds.  She called to say, simply,

"35 years ago today, right this minute."

Granted, we would talk again later, but that was her message at the time.

So yeah, yesterday was my 35th birthday.  I'm now 35 years old. And at 35, you get a new box.

You are now, "35 or older."  35-plus, even.  I'm a plus now.

It seems like only yesterday, I was one of the chosen ones, the sought-after.  I was in that highly desired group, males between the ages of 18 and 34.  But no longer.

Now I'm a marketing outcast.  I'm not hip or interesting.  Spike TV no longer gives a crap whether or not I watch their programs.

From an advertising standpoint, I no longer exist.

I'm overreacting, you say?  Making a mountain out of a molehill?  Maybe, but let's find out.

Go to google, and type in "males age 18-34." The first ten hits are all about advertising.  In fact, the first link is to a conference; a conference whose entire purpose is to talk about marketing to males in that age range.  In fact, the only non-advertising link in the first twenty hits?  The UFC home page.

Now, let's look at the other age group, shall we? "males age 35 and older"

First hit?  An link: How to Date Young Women.  In fact, nine of the top twenty hits are on the subject of dating (both straight and gay).  In the remainder, four are discussions of the male biological clock.  Not a peep about advertising, marketing, or targeting that demographic (well, I guess you could say there's some targeting going on, but that's a whole different post).  These are my people now.

Look, I'm not actually all that bothered about turning 35, just like I wasn't all that jarred by turning 30 (although 31 was a little strange).  It's just odd to note that, simply by virtue of turning one year older, and entire industry seems to have lost interest in my opinion.  They're more or less the same as they were on Monday, but they're just no longer suitable for measurement.  Just feels a little strange is all.

But everything will be all right.  I'm not going to start yelling at people to get off my lawn (at least, no more than usual).  I had a great birthday with a whole weekend of celebration to go along with it.  Now I can wind down a little, maybe watch some TV.

Maybe I'll even turn on Spike, just for old time's sake.


Anonymous said...

First of all, I've got to say that I've been yelling at the damned kids to get off my lawn since I hit 30 (that's when we bought the house down the street from the high school.)

Secondly, for women, it's just as fun -- I now count as AMA for this pregnancy: Advanced Maternal Age. How 'bout them apples!

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